By: Janine Serio
I kind of feel like this is a self-help post. It’s cool, though. Just as I coach clients on finding solutions to their struggles, I, too, need to do the same. And, sometimes, writing it out on paper (or the computer) can be just the thing that is needed!
This is kind of my “Achilles HEAL.” The one thing that I was, constantly, trying to achieve in life was leaving me frustrated, disappointed, and feeling paralyzed. I FINALLY get what Brene Brown has been saying for so long…this is “wholly unattainable.” Yup, she has been so right!
So, my new mindset – I am a “work in progress” ANTI-PERFECTIONIST.
In an effort to do this, though, I have to overcome one of my biggest struggles – the ability to TRUST again. I mean this in every sense of the word – trusting other people, trusting my own process, and trust that I will be okay.
While I have always found myself wanting to be in the driver’s seat, as of late, I have found this need to be in total CONTROL almost debilitating. I want to control everything – from the social situations I am in, to business, to my finances, to the relationships I have with people, and even my nutrition and exercise.
Hmm, so how did it get to be this way? Well, while I have ALWAYS had these tendencies – let’s just say I was known for rewriting my class notes over and over until the cursive looked pristine – when life threw me a huge curve ball, I resorted to the only thing I felt I could do.
Control every facet of my life that I COULD (or at least I thought) control. Boy, how that has totally not worked in my favor!
While this has been ongoing for the past 18 months, these last 2 weeks have been about new beginnings. While I am not going to make this all about the “D” word, I have had to accept the fact that I am now divorced.
Yup, the big old “D” word…and it sucks…and it has nothing to do with a DIET either!
As a health and wellness coach, one of the mindset shifts the 2 Health Nuts are constantly driving home with clients is learning how to TRUST themselves and their process. Most people, like me, want to be in control.
It’s easy. You just DO.
There is no thinking involved. There is no “work.” This is the same reason why some many diets fail!
How many of you have tried to follow a strict nutrition and/or workout program because you think it will get you results? There is no shame in admitting; we have all been there and we can all share our stories of how our willpower, eventually, waned and we completely rebounded.
Yes, I am fully admitting that I have used nutrition and exercise as a way to feel back in control. My mentality – my marriage has already fallen apart; at least I can keep my fitness and nutrition in check. As I commented before, this mindset has done nothing more than make me feel more frustrated, more rejected, and just wanting a change! Not to mention, I, now, understand what people mean when they say they have a “stress” belly!
I will even share a little story about how my need to control every facet of the 2 Health Nuts online business has not worked in my favor…
I have spent SO much time, energy, and resources creating and developing signature programs, products, and and online brand that, now, my work seems to look and sound just like my mentors and fellow colleagues. I have spent the last few months grinding it out with work, deeply entrenched in reading material, and I feel like I have lost what it means to think for myself.
I have lost MY voice and, instead, have adapted the voice of someone else’s! YIKES! Instead of letting my daily experiences, interactions, and authenticity guide my content, I feel like I have become a robot. Research, read, absorb, and recite back.
Just as I educate our clients to investigate “what is working” and “what is not working,” and finding solutions to their struggles, I, too, need to do the same to be the most effective coach and role model possible.
As fitness professionals, the concept of “knowing vs. doing” can become a real struggle and even WE get tripped up. This is WHY I feel so passionate about living out the anti-perfect lifestyle. Yes, it is SO HARD and, yes, it is uncomfortable and will take time BUT I, truly, know I will be a better person by working through this process.
Ahh, I feel so much better having been able to express that OUT LOUD! 🙂 Can you resonate?
If you are feeling the same way I am, and you NEED, and WANT, that change in your life, make sure to subscribe to the 2 Health Nuts “Inner Circle!” You can do so by going HERE!
On Monday, September 5th, we are going to pull back the curtain on what will be something pretty AMAZING for YOU! If you have wanted to work with the 2 Health Nuts, up close and personal, this will be a wonderful opportunity!
We hope you will join us! 🙂 Get on the list HERE!